It's Weird To Wake Up With A Tail
by Fanservice-911
Summary: America wakes up one day on England's couch to find he has dog ears and a tail. England seems to find it strangely attractive... UKUS  in that order , Masturbation, dog-ear-erogenous-zone abuse, lemon. Don't like, don't read.


How all this had happened, I would never know. All I could think when I woke up was how much my head and, strangely, my backside hurt. I looked around groggily, a mild panic starting inside me when I couldn't see a thing. I felt my eyes and realized I wasn't wearing my glasses. Well, that was one mystery solved.

_I must have been drunk,_ I thought, groaning. I couldn't remember ever visiting a bar last night, though... The whole thing was rather strange. _Where am I, anyway? _I was too scared to get up and bump into something, so I stayed still. I decided to figure out as much about my surroundings as possible from just lying there.

Okay, judging from the fabric and softness of the thing underneath me, I could safely assume I was on a couch. I frowned when a new thought hit me. Didn't this stuff feel exactly the same as England's couch? Not that I actually paid attention to details like that, of course not! That would be just creepy...

Footsteps from the kitchen were coming closer. I tried to sit up, but as soon as I moved, bursts of pain shot up my spine. I yelped- er, I just sat back.

"Idiot! Don't move!" I blinked. I knew that voice... "You've already caused enough trouble today, so just lie back and stay still for once."

"England...?" I asked. I couldn't see, but it would be impossible not to recognize that accent. There were some shuffling noises, and then suddenly my glasses were carefully placed back on my face. I looked over and grinned at the frustrated Brit beside me.

"Why'd you take my glasses?" I didn't really want to know why, but I figured it was better than saying nothing.

England frowned. "I just took them off because you were sleeping... Shouldn't you be more worried about _that?_" He was pointing at my head.

"What?"

"Idiot," he growled and left the room.

"H-Hey, wait!" I called. "What are you talking about?" He didn't respond.

I huffed, confused and frustrated. I mean, come on! You can't just leave someone hanging like that, it's so rude!

While I waited for him to come back, my curiosity got the better of me. I felt the top of my head, but there wasn't anything out of the ordinary. I moved my hand a little more to the side, until it hit something.

My first reaction: ...

My second reaction: What the hell was that.

"ARTHUR KIRKLAND!" I yelled, trying to sound authorative. I didn't get a response. I felt the thing on my head again, my confusion growing when it suddenly made my face feel really hot. What was that?

I played with it some more, trying to ignore the waves of heat it was sending me. It was furry, and seemed... Triangular. What could it be...?

I gasped, closing my eyes as I poked it hard. For some reason, touching it felt... strangely good. I continued playing with it, only vaguely aware that I was panting and my face was starting to get really red. I moaned softly, but I didn't realize what it was until another one escaped my lips.

England finally walked back in, carrying a mirror. "What was that noi-" He stopped, his irritated expression changing to shock when he saw what I was doing. "U-Uh, I-I..." he stuttered, staring at me with a strange look in his eyes.

"W-What?" I mumbled, flushing more than I already was. I pulled my hand away from my head, realizing that was the cause of such a weird reaction.

England was silent for a moment. "You... Might want to take a look at yourself," he finally said. He tentatively handed me the mirror. "Don't be afraid," he warned me. "I-It was just an accident, easily fixed!" I stared at him, frowning, then turned to the mirror.

Holy crap.

I had fucking dog ears. Furry, dark, cliche-triangular dog ears sitting on the top of my head.

"E-England..." I held the mirror closer to my face. "England, t-this is a joke or something, r-right?"

"I'm afraid not..."

"What the hell happened?" I stated more than asked. He was silent. I glared at him and repeated, louder, "What the hell happened to me?"

"I-I was in the middle of a spell, and you interrupted..." He trailed off, avoiding eye contact. "This is all your fault, you idiot."

I sat up and was about to retort, but I was interrupted by the searing pain in my backside. "W-What...?" My eyes widened. "Don't tell me..." I craned my neck to look behind me, and my suspicions were confirmed.

"A tail," I said flatly. "A fucking tail." I studied it silently. It was long, black, and furry. It kind of reminded me of a golden retriever's tail. "So what, I'm part dog now?"

"Yes," England confirmed hesitantly. "You... Also seemed to have developed a certain..." He paused, searching for the right word. "_Sensitivity _to them," he finished.

"What the hell does _that _mean?" I snapped.

"Well..." Was he blushing? "You..." A somewhat frightening look flickered in his eyes. "Maybe you will learn better from actions, not words."

"W-Wait, hang on!" I cried. "How long do you expect me to stay like this?"

He paused again. "If my calculations are correct, it should be gone by tomorrow morning. Now..." He cocked his head to one side, staring at me in an almost devilish way. "Why don't you try... Touching your ear again?"

"Why?" I asked defensively. "I-I mean, it's going to go away tomorrow, right? Why bother?" I laughed nervously. I wasn't sure why I reacted that way, but I just knew touching my ear again felt wrong somehow.

England didn't seem to feel that way, though. Narrowing his eyes, he growled, "Just do it."

I nodded slowly, mumbling assent. I closed my eyes as I reached up and started stroking the furry ear. The jolt of pleasure drove the fiery pain in my spine down to a dull aching. I gasped and my body immediately heated up. Why did it feel so damn good?

I completely forgot about my original thoughts about this, and that England was forcing me to do it; I forgot he was even there. I just knew I wanted more pressure, more friction on that ear. I rubbed it harder, my mouth falling open in a series of low moans and pants.

Without even meaning it, my other hand went up, and I was fiddling with both ears. God, it felt good!

My eyes shot open when I felt a hand on my tail. I looked and saw England petting it lightly, his green eyes watching my every movement in fascination. He smirked and pet it faster. I moaned louder and matched my erratic strokes to his rhythm.

"You're bloody adorable," he muttered. It barely registered in my brain. All I could think was how fucking great this felt.

"F-Faster..." I whispered shakily. I had no idea what I was saying - all I knew was that I wanted _more_. "Faster!"

"I'd be happy to oblige." His hand picked up the pace and mine were quick to duplicate his speed.

A euphoria like I'd never felt before was gripping my brain, taking hold of it entirely. I shivered. It felt too good.

"Do you like this?" England asked, a hint of seduction tracing his tone. I nodded, too overwhelmed to say anything. He smirked. "Do you understand now?" I shook my head. "Idiot, you're so slow..."

"S-Shut up!" I finally managed to choke out. "I-I am no- A-Ah...!" I gasped softly as one of his hands moved to my crotch. "W-What are y-you...?" I bit my lip as he pressed his palm down hard.

"Already excited?" he purred. "Excellent." Before I could even process what he said, he had pushed me down onto my back and was leaning over me, his eyes lighting up with hunger. "Do you want more?"

I wasn't sure what he meant exactly, but I nodded all the same. He grinned and bent down, touching his tongue to one of my furry ears. I yelped at the contact, but it turned into a drawn out moan when his entire mouth had engulfed it. The heat was like an all-consuming fire - a warmth sparking pleasure throught my entire body.

I didn't know what he was doing, but it didn't matter. Whatever it was, it sure felt pretty damn awesome.

He gave my ear a sly nibble, making me cry out. I threw my arms around his neck, holding onto him tightly. I was trying to think about what could possibly be happening to me, but my mind had shut down. The only thing that was functioning was my ability to feel.

England finally pulled away, soliciting a small whine from me. "More?" he asked, smiling fiendishly.

"Y-Yes, God yes," I panted.

"Aw, but you're so innocent!" he cooed. "I'd just feel awful about it..."

I grabbed him by the collar and shouted, "Now, damn it!"

He narrowed his eyes, his smile widening. "Of course." He undid my pants and slipped them off in about four seconds flat, and my underwear was gone in another two.

Something finally clicked in my strangely sluggish brain. "M-My erogenous zone is my ears..." I mumbled without realizing it. England paused.

"Finally got it, eh?" He chuckled. "Took you long enough."

I blushed. "W-Wait... A-Are you raping me?"

England sighed. "No," he said, irritated. "I would be raping you if I had, for lack of a better word, _penetrated_ you. There's also the little matter of _consent_..." He trailed off, his smile returning. "I would say this is closer to molestation."

"What's the difference?"

"Well, if you didn't like what I was doing just now, it would be molestation. Just inappropriate touches. Rape is more serious..." He grimaced. "Look, it doesn't matter. Neither of those words apply here, so can we continue?"

I managed a weak laugh, trying to disguise how badly I wanted that. "Y-Yeah." England obliged, grabbing my cock and squeezing it gently.

"Already hard," he commented. "Just excellent." He froze, making me go crazy with desire. You can't just start giving a guy a handjob and then stop! It's infuriating and the exact opposite of a turn-on.

I was about to yell at him, when he gave me this really freaky look. It was like he'd never seen me before, but really perverted at the same time. I could almost see the lightbulb hovering over his head.

"W-What?" I asked. I was almost too scared to know - the key word there being "almost."

His response was not what I expected, to say the least.

"Touch yourself."

I blinked. "What?"

He repeated it like he was casually commenting on a car he liked. "Touch yourself."

I'm pretty sure my face was the color of... Whatever is redder than red! It's not like I could really think at the moment!

"N-No way!" I shouted. "I'm not doing that!"

"You were doing it earlier," England pointed out. Damn him for remembering...

"T-That was different," I said defensively. "I didn't know what I was doing."

"You were still doing it."

"One time!" I insisted. "It was an accident!"

England grabbed my hand and held it over my ear threateningly. "Do it now, or I'm going to make you do it anyway," he hissed.

"Than that's not me doing it if you're forcing me!" I retorted. He chuckled.

"Really?" He dropped my hand and stood up. "I could walk away right now, you know. Then you would be all alone..." He laughed.

My eye twitched. "You're sick."

"What of it?"

"Um..."

"Stop stalling and do it," he snapped.

"Fine..." I whimpered. It was the most awkward moment in my life. I tried to forget England was standing there and how wrong this felt. _Just reach up, and..._

As soon as my hand made contact with the soft, black fur of my ear, I remembered why I had done this before. What I _couldn't _remember, was why I was so against this.

I fiddled and played with it like a kid with a new toy. _Faster, harder..._I just couldn't stop myself. It felt too good.

Before I knew it, my fingers were in my mouth, then out again, covered thoroughly in saliva. That probably didn't take very long because of how much my mouth was watering. I have no idea how I knew what to do - I guess it was just instincts.

I inserted a finger into my entrance, quickly followed by a second and third. I couldn't stop my hand from pulling out partly, and then shoving back in again; it had a mind of it's own. I cried out in pleasure, the already-overwhelming euphoria completely smothering out whatever thoughts I had had left.

My pushed both my hands faster, harder, rougher... I added another digit to join the other three being thrust inside me, and I'm pretty sure my dog ear was pretty bruised up from so much rubbing. I just could not stop.

"E-England," I gasped, closing my eyes, "i-it feels so... G-Good..." He smiled.

"See? I told you," he replied, but I wasn't listening.

"En-England!" I shouted as my fingers struck my prostrate. "A-Ah, f-fuck...!" I hit there again and again, sending waves of pleasure through me. My other hand finally left my abused ear and involuntarily went to my cock, rubbing up and down. I gave it a squeeze, needing something warm and tight around it.

"I'll get that," I heard England say, pushing my hand away. His words might as well have been a different language. My first reaction was a whine, which quickly changed to a loud moan as he took the entire thing in his mouth and started to suck me off.

At this point, I only had one hand busy and the other one was itching for something to do. It reached out blindly and hit something slightly fuzzy.

"Oh G-God, Ame-America...!" England would have shouted, but his voice was muffled by my length in his mouth. I smiled when I vaguely understood it was his eyebrow I had hit. My hand stroked it casually, making England moan around my cock. I bucked my hips, but he held onto them and forced them down, so as not to choke. It was a glorious feeling.

My fingers hit my prostrate once more and the pleasure was just too much. With a satisfied, lusty cry, I came into England's mouth and pulled my fingers out. England pulled away, tore of his pants and boxers, and somehow forced his cock into my panting mouth in only three seconds. I swear, he must practice or something to get such a good time. But that's off topic.

I closed my eyes and starting humming. It didn't take much for him to let out a strangled moan and come, which is a shame, since I was just getting started.

We both flopped back, completely exhausted. I had so many things I wanted to say, but was too tired to say them. I think England felt the same way.

We fell asleep soon after, our arms wrapped tightly around each other.

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><p>I woke up the next morning to the sound of a <em>crash <em>and a scream. I bolted upright - bad move, considering the fire in my back. I looked, and noticed my tail was gone. It made me just a little sad to see that.

I looked up at the sound of footsteps. My eyes widened and my whole body stiffened. "E-England?" I mumbled in amazement.

England was standing there, an extremely seductive look on his face. On top of his head was a pair of orange cat ears and a long tail looming out from behind him. The only thing he was wearing was a tiny, black apron, and a white collar with cuffs.

"Hey, look what the cat dragged in," I said, laughing. He chuckled, too, advancing towards me.

"Ready for round two?" he purred.

"Fuck yeah."

* * *

><p><strong>A highly enjoyable request from someone on deviantART. ^^ I think it came out pretty good, non~?<strong>

**Reviews and critique are highly appreciated!**


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